Monday, February 7, 2011

Dirty Rodents

Took some shots (camera shots for now) of the little buggers who are able to leap from the trees down onto our porch. They get into all of Wendy's plants and dig them up, eat off her tomato plants and occasionally poop. When it was time to ditch Cooper and Cosmo's gingerbread house, I put it out for the birds and the squirrels were the ones who attacked it hardest.

It took a day, but once one of them realized the thing was out there and he couldn't get the candy out of the frosting, it was like he called in the troops.


Three more promptly showed in within the half hour and they had completely hauled the thing away in chunks. It was kind of funny to watch them try to make it back to the tree branch carrying the pieces as its a good 6 foot jump. A couple of times they went right to the ground below missing the branch completely. Come spring time when its time to put plants out again, they'll be eating BB's or pellets so things can actually grow out there. Fatten up now guys, fatten up now...

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Horrible :)

A man walked into a curio shop in Galveston Texas.
Looking around at the exotica, he noticed a very life-like, life-size
bronze statue of a rat. It had no price tag, but it looked so striking
that he decided he must have it.
He took it to the owner and asked "How much is the bronze rat?"
"Twelve dollars for the rat, a hundred dollars if you bring it back,"
said the owner.
The man gave the shop owner twelve dollars. "I'll take the rat; and
I won't be bringing it back."
As he walked down the street carrying the bronze rat, he noticed that
a few real rats had crawled out of alleys and sewers, and began
following him down the street. This was a bit disconcerting, so he began
to walk a little bit faster. Within a couple of blocks, the group of rats
behind him grew to over a hundred, and they began squealing.
He started to trot towards the Harbor.
He took a nervous look around and saw that the rats numbered in the
thousands, maybe in the millions, and they were all squealing and
coming towards him faster and faster.
Terrified, he ran to the edge of the water and threw the bronze rat
as far out into the Harbor as he could. Amazingly, the millions of rats all
jumped into the water after it, and were drowned.
The man walked back to the curio shop. "Aha," said the owner,
"You're bringing it back !"
"Actually no," said the man. "I came back to see how much you want
for that little bronze Mexican over there!"

And another one...

Cursing at Work

Dear Employees:

It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their co-workers.

Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.

We do, however, realize the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with co-workers.

Therefore, a list of 18 New and Innovative 'TRY SAYING' phrases have been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.

Number 1
TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF: You don't know what the f___ yo u're doing.

Number 2
TRY SAYING: She's an aggressive go-getter.
INSTEAD OF: She's a f___ing bit__.

Number 3
TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late.
INSTEAD OF: And when the f___ do you expect me to do this?

Number 4
TRY SAYING: I'm certain that isn't feasible.
INSTEAD OF: No f___ing way.

Number 5
TRY SAYING: Really?
INSTEAD OF: You've got to be sh___ing me!

Number 6
TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with...
INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a sh__.

Number 7
TRY SAYING: I wasn't involved in the project.
INSTEAD OF: It's not my f___ing problem.

Number 8
TRY SAYING: That's interesting.
INSTEAD OF: What the f___?

Number 9
TRY SAYING: I'm not sure this can be implemented.
INSTEAD OF: This sh__ won't work.

Number 10
TRY SAYING: I'll try to schedule that.
INSTEAD OF: Why the f___ di dn't you tell me sooner?

Number 11
TRY SAYING: He's not familiar with the issues.
INSTEAD OF: He's got his head up his a__.

Number 12
TRY SAYING: Excuse me, sir?
INSTEAD OF: Eat sh__ and die.

Number 13
TRY SAYING: So you weren't happy with it?
INSTEAD OF: Kiss my a__.

Number 14
TRY SAYING: I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
INSTEAD OF: F__ it, I'm on salary.

Number 15
TRY SAYING: I don't think you understand.
INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your a__.

Number 16
TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.
INSTEAD OF: This f___ing job sucks.

Number 17
TRY SAYING: You want me to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF: Who the f___ died and made you boss?

Number 18
TRY SAYING: He's somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF: He's a pr_ck.

Thank You,
Human Resources

Napoleon Dynamite Trivia

While cleaning out an old email account to cancel it out, I found this email that was sent to me from a friend and thought I'd share. When it came out, the movie was kind of a quiet fad and seemed like it went away fast...

The name "Napoleon Dynamite" is a pseudonym used by
Elvis Costello for his 1986 album, "Blood and
Chocolate". Executive producer Jeremy Coon has stated
that the similarity is a coincidence and that the
producers were unaware of Costello's usage of the name
until the film was in production.

Every dish shown during the opening credits is eaten
by a character later in the movie. The dishes
presented in the opening credits were the work of the
three people who present them.

Due to the film's surprise success at festivals and at
the major city box offices, Fox Searchlight is going
to re-release the film with nationwide distribution
and add a 5 minute epilogue at the end of the film.
This epilogue, which was filmed after the initial
theatrical run, apparently features a surprise
"wedding scene". And cost about half of what the
entire feature cost to make.

Jon Gries (Uncle Rico) was asked to do many scenes in
which he was eating steak. Gries, who is a vegetarian,
would chew the steak and later spit it out. In fact,
there is one scene, in which you can see Gries
spitting the chewed meat into his hand.

In the second cafeteria scene, when Napolean and Pedro
discuss prospective dance dates, Napolean is wearing a
Ricks College t-shirt. Ricks College was a junior
college in Idaho that maintained close association
with Brigham Young University up until 2000, when
Ricks was formally named an official satellite of BYU,
henceforth BYU-Idaho. Jared and Jerusha Hess, the
film's co-writers, both attended BYU.

Features one of the longest credited cast lists in
movie history; all 181 student extras' names are
listed in the closing credits.

The movie was edited in producer Jeremy Coon's
apartment using a $6,000 Macintosh with Final Cut Pro.

Behind-the-scenes at the 2004 Sundance Film Festival,
Fox Searchlight engaged in a bidding war with Warner
Independent Pictures over the distribution rights to
this movie, until Fox Searchlight put in a last-minute
bid of over $3 million, and won. They would later join
forces with Paramount Pictures and MTV Films to
distribute the film, a mere 17 days before its
release.

Uncle Rico is actually an avid vegetarian and doesn't
drink milk (although his character eats steak and
drinks milk throughout the film). You can actually see
Uncle Rico spit out the piece of steak he is chewing
on in the scene immediately after he whips the steak
at Napoleon's head. Watch closely as he sits down and
you can see him spit out the steak and put it back on
his plate.

Jon Heder was paid $1,000 to play Napoleon Dynamite.
The movie grossed over $40,000,000 in the United
States.

Jon Heder drew all of the "drawings" in the movie
except the unicorn.

The "liger" is a real animal, created when a male lion
mates with a female tiger.

For Napolean's dance routine, director Jared Hess had
Jon Heder improvise and dance to three different
songs. Hess then took the "best" moves from each song
and put them in one routine, using one song.

The scene where Uncle Rico hits Napoleon in the face
took four takes.

Shot in 22 days.

Jon Heder's big dance scene was the last scene
scheduled and they ran out of film while shooting it.
The sequence was edited together from less than 10
minutes of him dancing.

The scene of the farmer shooting the cow in front of
the school bus full of children is a true anecdote
from the director's childhood.

Jon Heder helped to make the boondoggle keychains
between scenes.

Jon Heder credits Tina Majorino (Deb) with helping to
choreograph the dance scene. He also states that some
of the dance moves were "borrowed" from Michael
Jackson, Backstreet Boys, John Travolta, Soul Train,
as well as some of his own moves.